CHAPTER III THE HIDDEN WHOLENESS: PARADOX IN TEACHING AND LEARNING

Palmer writes that we are trained to “think the world apart,” dissecting it into either-ors, but we need to learn to “think the world together,” embracing opposites and appreciating paradoxes. The principle of paradox can guide us in thinking about classroom dynamics—and in designing a teaching and learning space that can hold the community of truth.

In what ways have you experienced “suffering” as a student teacher? Has your suffering had any redemptive quality to it; that is, has it made you heart larger? What would help you deepen the redemptive quality of the suffering your experience in your work?

 

Well I think I have experienced "suffering" as a student teacher when I sometimes try to do a good job with my students, and I receive some criticism from my tutor even when my students express satisfaction and learning.    

Moreover, if during the classes I see the faces of my students and they look bored or impatient for the end of class I feel some "suffering" because I think I am failing as a teacher. Similarly when I am not able to hear all their thoughts due to various factors such as the short time in the classroom that makes me feel sufferings because I think that sometimes even their own parents do not pay attention to them and they seek to find in me a guide. 

I believe that through these experiences, I have developed a redemptive quality because I have learned to develop capacity to withstand and cope with pain in my heart but do not let that negatively interfere with my job as student teacher, contrary that situation creates in me the desire to help people, and I can feel more engage to work harder. Despite the errors or failures I see them like challenges to overcome. 

I think that would help me deepen my suffering redemptive quality  the accumulation of experiences and help people forgetting  my "suffering" and focus on what's best for my students by placing them as the most important actors of the teaching-learning process, understanding the true essence of teaching new generations.

Name some of your key gifts or strengths as a teacher. Now name a struggle or difficulty you commonly have in teaching. How do you understand the relation between your profile of giftedness and the kind of trouble you typically get into in the classroom?

First I consider my greatest gift is the opportunity to care for the learning needs of my students and work to help them to become people useful to society. 

Some of my key gifts as a teacher are: 

• Strong desire to help my students and the vocation to teach.
• The ease of establishing close relationships with my students.
• My ability as a counselor and my ability to motivate students to love learning.
• My ability to work with both academics and the social and moral part in the lives of students.
• Some difficulties that I commonly faced when I am teaching are:
• The lack of creativity in the design of my classes to keep my students interested because sometimes they get bored easily.
• Sometimes I have difficulty controlling discipline in the classroom.
• Occasionally I have difficulties mastering some issues regarding the techniques and methods that I used to develop certain activities.

 
I understand the relationship between the profile of giftedness and the difficulties typically I faced in the classroom as a paradox through which teaching takes place, if  we embrace  a viewpoint in which opposites are joined, so  that way we could see things clearly  and as a whole. Through that we can learn more about the self-hood from which good teaching comes.

I think that  we all have our strengths and weaknesses and knowing them helps us accept ourselves as unique individuals within a whole. Finally a good teacher must use that ability discern among its qualities to overcome the difficulties towards the best education for their students.

Describe a moment in teaching when things went so well you knew you were “born to teach” and compare it to a moment in which things went so poorly you wished you had never been born! Name the gifts that made this good moment possible—not the techniques you used or the moves you made, but your qualities.

I have experienced some situations in which I felt that I "was born to teach" as an example when I had to say good-bye to my first group of students. They felt very sad and disappointed. I was surprised when I received some letters in which they expressed appreciation for my work, and said that they will miss my teachings. I felt very satisfied as a teacher. Likewise, when I began teaching in high school the first class that I taught I felt happy when at the end of the class the students came and said that they wanted me as their teacher the rest of the year.  Having experienced those situations made me feel I was "born" to teach.

At the other hand, I felt that I had never been "born" to teach was when I taught my first English class. I was too nervous, and I made ​​many mistakes during that class I noticed that my students even complained because they felt I was not prepared, and they felt uneasy with my presence. It was a hard experience for me.

I consider that my qualities that made ​​it possible that I have received such gifts as a result of my teaching are the commitments as a student teacher I have for my work. I always try to stay positive and be a good role model for students. I believe that if students do not have positive models, they will not feel influenced to love learning and they could experience lack of motivation and interest in learning. Another quality could be my responsibility to work and the ability to develop love of neighbor.